As much as you and your spouse might want to provide a stable, conducive and happy home for your children, an unhappy marriage can give you the exact opposite of this. When one or both parents believe divorce is inevitable, it is important that you understand the dangers that come with a litigated divorce, especially to the children.
While it may not work for every couple going through a divorce, a properly structured mediation can benefit the kids in a number of ways. Here are some of them:
1. Mediation can lay the foundation for better communication
In a litigated divorce, lawyers and the judge do all the talking and make all the decisions on behalf of the divorcing parties.
In divorce mediation, however, you and your spouse take control of the process, learn how to cooperate and make sound decisions regarding the wellbeing of your children. These vital skills can be used over and over as co-parents.
2. Mediation keeps things out of the public eye
Choosing litigation means that you will be settling your divorce in a public forum. This can be harmful to your kids, especially if the divorce is contentious and heavily publicized. Mediation, on the other hand, is a private affair.
This means that your children are less likely to be dragged into your difference, hear about your drama from their friends or even get wind of the specific details of your divorce settlement – unless one of you decides to tell them, of course.
3. Mediation focuses on the future, not the past
If you do not have kids, a divorce that dwells on the past might not cause much harm. However, if you have kids, then divorce should be focusing on how you are going to raise your children going forward.
Mediation is all about the future and what is in the best interests of your children rather than blame games and finger-pointing. It aims to help the couple find a fair and amicable way of settling various issues like child custody and visitation, property division and spousal support.
Done right, divorce mediation can create a less stressful environment and ensure that your children’s best interests are protected.